Breathing Together: A Guide for Integral Relationships

Welcome to an exploration of an Integral Approach to Relationships. Integral Relationships are a reliable context for both horizontal translation and vertical transformational development and open our lives to a new potential of well-being which can include greater complexity and experience of attunement, secure attachment, awareness and attention. This potential relies on the profound influence partners have on each other to more fully understand and accept the promise of paradox inherent in two unique selves joining together in commitment to grow and evolve developmentally. The book is organized into four (4) Parts. Part I - Getting Integral, provides some basic framework for those interested in integral theory and the potential of Integral Relationships. The development process can be understood through the metaphor of the Climber(s) or the two Self(s), the Ladder, and the View. I suggest a differentiation of the Shadow, into dark and bright aspects, each with recognizable impact on the self-system, and how partners are sometimes powerfully drawn to each other s bright shadow/dark shadow within the context of a Relationship. Consideration of States, Lines, Types, Cycles, Phases, and the Quadrants adds to a more Integral Approach to the understanding of human relatedness. A Psychograph of Levels and Lines of Individual Development, and a Mutual Discourse Graph are proposed as tools for assessment of Relationships. Part II - The Brain, describes some pertinent neuroscience research related to the Primitive Brain, Thinking Brain, and Integral Brain framework which is an inherently developmental and evolutionary orientation to the structure of the human brain in the context of Relationships. The Primitive Brain, Thinking Brain, and Integral Brain are the neural correlates of the Pre-rational, Rational, and Trans-rational stages of consciousness. Part III - The Mind, describes the Primitive Mind, Thinking Mind, and Integral Mind and offers a discussion of the significance of the top-down and bottom-up processes in the contest of Relationships. There are numerous social and cultural implications to an understanding of the Primitive Mind and its presence and accessibility to all human beings. The Thinking Mind is sometimes capable of overriding the impulsive and automatic nature of the Primitive Mind, in part by asking the Big Question, What do I need right now to be OK and to be healthy in the long term? The healthy Thinking Mind is focused on OK-ness. It is the realization and frustration of the limitations of the Thinking Mind in context of Relationships that very well may propel some to become interested in the possibilities of the Integral Mind and Integral Relationships. The Integral Mind and Integral Relationships add the potentials of IAM-ness as well as a mind, body, and spirit integration to partners lives. Part IV - Competencies and Practices for Integral Relationships, presents twenty-five (25) competencies for Integral Relationships. These competencies can be developed through a cross-training approach to some twenty-two (22) practices for Integral Relationships. We will attempt to show throughout the book, why and how the understanding and future development of this approach will be beneficial to those interested in Integral Relationships, both personally and professionally. Read more